Making Up Lost Time
In some ways, this closing week was my best week in three months since the attack on me that resulted in a cowardly attacker breaking three of my favourite ribs. It wasn’t just my ribs that were seriously damaged though, other injuries with the broken ribs ultimately and literally brought me down. There hasn’t been a day pass that I haven’t revisited the event nor had I some pain in my body resulting from his spiteful, childish and malicious act. The reality of being injured by another having a hissy fit is the false perception that we can and will recover what we had before. An attack of this kind is never merely an accident. Any attack borne in anger of this particular kind always carries with it the dynamic intent to impart immeasurable harm in the moment, regardless of the unpredictable outcome and it’s this that makes the difference. Striking anyone for whatever reason will always result in some level of injury the attacker will have no control over. To be taken out of normal life for three months is no small thing. These three months can never really be fully recovered. You have to write them off and start over as best you can. I think I have been fortunate. I had good health and strength up to the point of impact and I am as able as is practicably possible to be. Please, no platitudes. I know exactly where I am and I am, as ever, perfectly content to be in this place.
The man who so seriously damaged me took three months off my life to simply dismiss them. You cannot attack a 74-year-old man from behind, riding his bike and without him knowing, and not expect the outcome and intent to cause damage even serious damage at that. I can tell you, this man has caused me both physical and mental damage the depth of which he actually has no true knowledge of as yet. Why? I simply told him that he was wrong to force cyclists off the cycle path because he didn’t want to run on the pedestrian path where it was not generally allowed for cyclists to ride on. My reason for interceding? two of the three cyclists in front of me were small children and they were confused by his bullying.
The outcome of running at someone full speed with both arms locked outstretched for an attack will break bones, tear skin, bruise and strain any victim and probably cause long-term damage and possibly even death. Everyone knows this. Where it mattered most to me was that I have a family of four sons and a daughter most of whom have children. I did not know when I was going down that I would ever take a breath again. Subsequently, lying on the pavement and still unable to release or take a breath, I still did not know if I would ever be able to breathe again. Looking back on those first five minutes after the attack, I see now that I could quite easily have died. Of course, my family feels the pain of what happened. Friends and the people I work with feel it too. The impact of what he did, simply because someone confronted his actions towards others as being selfish and ill-considered, doesn’t end at the scene of the offence but merely starts there. And if that sounds somewhat dramatic, it’s not at all.
I have so much yet to do in my life to conclude my work so shortening my remaining years by three months is by no means inconsequential. I ended up redirecting my energies to different channels of work that took out the physical demand my furniture-making with hand tools relies constantly on. Many in my audience worldwide advised me not to do this and that, to not get back too soon and I know they said this with the best intentions, but I knew I had to take responsibility for my own life, listen to my body, consider the advice of medical professionals where necessary and so on but, ultimately, I felt that getting back to work as soon as possible was the best recovery path I could take as long as I did it carefully. Looking back now I am glad this is what I did because two days after the attacker broke into my life in the way he did, by trying to work my body, I better identified what the medics could not. I found my weak spots and played to them accordingly by supporting them with other parts I would normally never use so determinately: using two hands on my saw handles in a non-typical manner enabled me to redirect energies while at the same time still moderately exercising my dominant arm and shoulder. I relied then on my torso and legs and all of this meant that I was creating self-related therapy according to how this or that part of my body felt. Another thing that is not so obvious and yet crucial is to learn more about our bodies through injury, damage, pain and, yes, an intentional assault.
Having an accident caused unintentionally by the action of another or ourselves or some other happenstance thing does not at all or in any way carry with it any other dynamic than something simply went wrong. What occurred was completely unintentional. Now we can have accidents causing damage to us that may not be intentional at all but carelessness and wanton recklessness may not have any intention to damage us but it does add a dynamic that cannot be considered accidental and therefore ignored. For instance, people power-driven in their running, cycling and driving often do so with the intention of forcing their pathway through and additionally, their will on others to get them out of their way. It’s become a more common reality without any question that runners and cyclists can and do get irritated by anyone who gets in their way. They, in the moment, develop attitudes and flawed feelings toward others and I see this just about every day if not more. The feeling of dominance in their quest for uninterrupted exercise can be and often is highly intimidating to those exercising at a slower pace who, well, get in their way and that is when most often things can go very wrong. Hence, here in the UK, we are using something of an archaic law to prosecute this not-so-small percentage of cyclists aggressively barrelling through without due regard for road conditions, environments and other users legitimately using the roads and cycle paths for walking and running, etc.
As it stands, such cyclists in the UK who kill or seriously injure someone whilst riding can be jailed for a mere maximum of two years, under an 1861 law: ‘wanton or furious driving ‘. This is by no means much of a sentence for an intentional speed-drive leading to such serious consequences and imagine having to kill someone or seriously injuring someone before any action at all is taken. I find this especially so in our present age where macho-man cyclists do indeed ride their bikes irresponsibly and would well fit the criteria “Wanton and furious“, Factor into that that many bikes now have the added assist power as electric bikes with battery-driven motors together with the momentum the added weight batteries and frames bring to such bikes; now we indeed have a real and uncontrolled problem. With bikes now weighing half as much as the man riding it, and the problem seems to always be men, you have an accident or death just waiting to happen. In my case, an altercation arose because the runner was forcing his will on two small children and a mother all cycling on three independent bikes just ahead of me in the specific cycle path they were supposed to be on and not him. I stopped to speak to the runner. There were no raised voices or expletives, just a few simple words confronting his action and his defending his turf. Subsequently, in a matter of seconds, he decided to add the dynamic of violence and it’s this that changes everything to inflict both physical and mental damage on another. The other in this case was me!
This has been my third design to conclude since the assault but I actually made about ten or more of the three pieces in the development phases of the designs. The first two were relatively small pieces. I did this on purpose as a lead-in back to gradually heavier work and the more demanding energy furniture making with hand tools demands. As on the day of the attack, I didn’t know how much I would recover or how serious the damage would be. I now find myself being ever-grateful for the level of recovery I have had. I am always surprised by just how much repetitive work still spikes my appetite for what Texans call the “same ol’, same ol.” I just love every aspect of my woodworking with hand tools and it never seems to get old. It has been that way for 60 years thus far and I see no waning in my love of the ordinary and then too the extraordinary. If I tire at the end of the day and the work seems a little more tedious than at the start of the day, I clean up, sweep up and put up and write, draw or whatever else is productive for me and the next morning I am just as keen as when I was a fifteen-year-old. The week I started the bedside tables I cut eight housing dadoes in quick succession, 17 ” long, 3/4″ wide and quarter-of-an-inch deep. Though it’s in spruce (relatively soft), the knots and their surrounding grain are a beast to work with with chisels and saws as they are hard and as dense as any other wood you care to name and have no grain run you can reliably follow with your cutting edges. As always, I did enjoy the whole of it still, and what was really nice for me at this stage in my recovery is that I have a few days of working where I experience no pain or strain to my rib area as in recent months. Oh, there is still some discomfort in other parts of my body that I find myself cushioning now and then, and I did have physio to help gain relief, overall I am now doing much better.
The good thing for me now is that I am unhindered in my work bringing everything I know to others around the world. My greatest worry at first was that I would not get back to where I was three months ago. You see, my work is not yet finished. I have at least two more books to write, drawings to do and designs yet to make and I expect that to be another three or more year’s working. Fact is, even when I do finally finish my curriculum, I hope I can have five more years designing and making pieces yet still in my head and to do this selfishly for my own enjoyment. Who knows, perhaps I might even have an exhibition of Paul Sellers’ designs. You know, a dozen or so studio-made pieces and such but made in my usual garage space. This would take some radically different, in-my-space videoing: I’m thinking quite invasive, in-your-way stuff.
Anyway, I still feel inspired and have ambition. This ingredient is so important for makers like myself committed to my craft. My apprenticing others through their formative steps to mastering their skills in our distance learning energies has opened the doors for many thousands who might eventually embark on becoming makers full-time and in their own right. I do hope so.
My mind never really stops. I am always creating and designing life. The engineer in me shows how we evolve when we are makers. I pick up a section of steel, perhaps an old file, and make a blade for my plough plane or an alternative router plane. It’s quicker and cheaper than scrolling down eBay and I get the chemistry of making in my brain that feeds my soul as a maker. Today, I am taking a break in Wales. Leaning on nature by a lake and a river and then a stream flowing down to the sea just below me. I arrived in a storm of lashing rains and wind but even that has a way of rewarding me. After a restful night’s sleep, I enjoyed breakfast and saw sunshine over the mountains. Life is good!
All the best Paul – I trust the perpetrator is being dealt with in due course…..? Perhaps a woodworking lesson will restore some balance in his behaviour.
My Dad had a woodshed he used for those type of “lessons”!
The perpetrator needs to learn how to be at ease in his mind before he will ever build up his body.
So glad to hear that you are recovering in body and mind, especially with the wonderful surroundings.
Paul,
My worst moments, probably, as a young adult were when I lost control in a fit of road rage. Never physically violent, but ugly, out of character, and pathetic. I don’t forget those moments, and I don’t particularly understand them either. What part of my ego takes over, where has it come from, and how can I be sure that I control it in future? I remember my dad screaming at other drivers, my mum looking on in disgust and a mixture of fear and hilarity between me and my brother. I’m a fairly relaxed man these days, so perhaps maturity has finally caught up with me. My kids see none of my old self. Or maybe it’s just further under the surface. It’s certainly a recognisable weakness of character, and one that I should investigate further. It was always been behind the wheel, and it seems that way in many others. I wonder if there is something inherent in the design of our systems of travel that brings out this rage? Men (as you say, nearly always men) competing with themselves to get from A to B as quickly as possible, in the foreground of an ultra-competitive world. Our time, we’re told, is so precious that we need every minute of it now. A friend once told me of an altercation whilst lane-swimming in a public pool! I don’t know the answer. I do hope, however, that your attacker’s innate empathy (we all have it) causes him to consider his actions. I don’t believe in the prison system, or the crass desire to have people locked up. I firmly believe that there will be a small part of that man who understands that what he did was wrong. His macho posterior, his ego, will try and convince himself of his justifications. But every time he thinks back to the event, and he will, he’ll be touched by the sadness of it. He’ll recognise his pathetic weakness in it, and it will conflict in his heart and soul. He’ll realise that he’s nothing, and nothing to you, just another sad man who’s physical strength isn’t backed by mental strength. Over time, his empathy will increase and he’ll become the guy who confronts bullies on the streets; he won’t realise it’s because he sees his former self in them. He’ll maybe even forgive himself. He’ll never know whether you’ve forgiven him, though, and I expect that’ll bother him for a long time. I hope he can find his happiness, and become a better man.
All the best,
Rico
Wonderfully said. Thank you Rico.
I was so sorry to hear of the senseless assault you experienced. I was also buoyed by your determination and drive to go past this terrible incident. I write to express my sincere appreciation to you for the wonderful lessons in woodworking and in life that you express so well and so freely. You’re a gem. Very best wishes from Australia.
I’m glad you’re on the mend and appreciate all I’ve learned over the years through your videos on WWMC. One lesson that may be taken away from this for anyone else who might find themselves in a similar situation is never engage with a stranger who is showing signs of aggression unless you’re prepared to deal with the ramp-up of that aggression and are prepared to defend yourself. Certainly never turn your back on the person and assume the confrontation is over on your terms. The lack of street smarts is the assumption that other humans are abiding by the same rules of civility and decency, and it can be fatal.
Paul,
I was very, very sorry to hear about the awful attack you suffered. I can’t say anything you haven’t already thought about but I hope you know that the community of like-minded individuals you have created are friends as well as woodworkers.
Wishing you a full recovery and sending my warmest good wishes,
Ron
good roads and fair weather , i hope your healing is is as good as your gifts of knowledge that you have given all of us.
arlie anderson
Dear Paul, so glad to see that you’re back in the saddle again. I was very saddened by what happened to you and thought the worst as I store for your health.
Faithful student of your teachings and philosophy.
Hang tough.
Ed.
Hi Paul, did I see you walking along the prom in Aberystwyth? Hope it was because you look happy.
Cheers Martin
Dear paul
A terrible loss for anyone but especially for some one so gifted as you
You have not mentioned it, but in reliving the traumatic event you must’ve had misgivings saying to yourself if I had it to do over again I would have not confronted the miscreant. it was not worth the price
in MHO there’s no right answer
In it’s good you’re no longer in Texas because in the USA he might’ve been “packing”
Thanks
Kenny
The day after the event, one of my adult children mentioned the choice I made to speak to the assailant might be worth picking my battles for but then he followed on with, “But I know you and you would most likely do the same again!” And then as now I woulkd and without hesitation. Most likely I would not turn to walk away until I knew that he was far enough from me to do me no harm, that’s the difference. Freedom to speak our minds and then too to defend the safety of children are both non-negotiables.
The problem is here you are a teacher, not just someone riding his bike around town. As a teacher, are you encouraging us to ‘speak our mind’ and face the consequences?
He has simply said, “Freedom to speak our minds and defend the safety of children are both non-negotiables.” Further, he has demonstrated the courage to defend others. None of that means one should act without consideration, to shoot off one’s mouth without reflection, or to act cavalierly. I do not think he has advocated for others to take any action or inaction, but has simply shared his experience and shared the values underlying his decisions. There is a large gap between him expressing his belief that certain freedoms are non-negotiable and the assertion that he is encouraging others to do anything.
Paul, I think you did exactly the right thing demanding things of your body progressively and with sensitivity. I had to do this after my heart surgery and I believe the reason I was able to recover was the care of my doctor and my willingness to exercise. I remember being afraid to walk around the block because of uncertainty and a sense of disconnection from myself and the world and then progressing over weeks and months to walk across town and, in the following year or two, to cycling. What I really want to share is that I remember thinking that there were things that would never heal, pains that would never resolve, but in fact they slowly did. The biggest changes took place in a few months, but even at a half year, a year, and even longer I remember realizing that something or another that had been bothering me, something I had learned to tune out or work with, was no longer there. I hope you, too, will find any impediments and discomforts melting away through the heat of your diligence and perseverance.
Thanks for the update.
…”three of my favourite ribs”
This gave me a good belly-laugh, Paul! Humour is always the antidote to malice in this world, I find – good on you.
Tom
We have a walking & bike trail near us. It can sometimes be a problem because some people are not civil I suspect from drug and entitlement issues. We were preparing to cross the street one day and were waiting for the crosswalk light to change when a runner ran by us without pausing right into traffic. When a car driver beeped the horn in warning he started berating the driver for being careless! An argument ensued with both parties going to call the police!
We also have bikes and e-bikes which are silent and fast to someone walking. If either my wife or I were hit we could be easily injured or maimed for life if not killed. But they wiz by without warning sometimes starting us when suddenly they are inches away.
Just a few days ago the wife of an eighty year old man was killed in the middle of a crosswalk in the same area because someone was in a hurry. The driver of the car destroyed two lives that day.
I’m not sure what the answer is, we live in a small town but something is wrong with a growing number of people.
Paul, if somebody is recovering from injury, in Greece we wish him “to be from steel from now on”.
So be from steel dear friend.
“Be from steel from now on.” I’m definitely filing that one away for later use. I love it!
After a serious cycling accident in 2021 (in a quiet country spot that I am familiar with and often cycle by), the medics kept telling me to rest for months afterwards. Terrible advice! :D. I lost a huge amount of strength & fitness :(. We need to stay active, as much as sensibly possible. You and my older brother (who has recovered remarkably well from an even more serious accident some years earlier) are both right: we need to stay active, for our health and wellbeing.
As always Paul, you are an excellent example for us all to strive for. You enrich our lives immensely. :). All the best 😉
BTW I too worry about electric vehicles, especially when a humble Nissan Leaf can out accelerate a classic Porsche at the lights. Accidents waiting to happen 🙁
Paul, thank you for relating the circumstances of the most unfortunate – and unnecessary – event that befell you. Please, has the offender been identified and charged? I pray that to be so and that he will be punished to the full extent of the law. Further, I pray that your legal team takes him to civil court for both physical and punitive damages incurred.
Heal well and fully, my friend.
And to those who think that had this happened in Texas that the miscreant might have been packing, let me allay those concerns. I’ve lived in Texas for 30 years now. While I do encounter people who are carrying firearms – as I sometimes do – I think that finding a runner on a bike path with a firearm would be almost an impossibility.
Our society in the US and – I think – in Europe and the UK – has become one centered on entitlement instead of cooperation, as it once was. As an octogenarian I struggle to understand why, when and how this change occurred. I put it down to liberalism gone awry, but that is probably just as much my prejudice showing as any wisdom I’ve attained in 8+ decades.
All the best, Paul.
Thanks for the update. Out of all of this Paul, what strikes me the most, is your positive mindset throughout. This isn’t anything new for you. I’ve picked up on that throughout your blogs over the hears. I have found that very inspirational as I face challenges in life. Were there specific moments that happened to you in life that developed this? Or, was it a gradual process?
Looking forward to the new pieces and future projects.
I’m so glad to hear that you’re recovery from assault is moving on apace. As you said, I’m sure your fitness has been of great benefit in your recovery, however I think that your resilience is in part down to the fact that you have been self sufficient for so many years, be it as an apprentice or all those years in the USA and elsewhere, and this has given you a mental strength to match your physical strength. Reading all the comments, it must be slightly strange for you to realise the depth of respect, affection and concern from so many across the world, most of whom you’ve never met or are likely to meet. In short, you have lived life well, and your teaching is about so much more than just the mechanics of woodworking. You have contributed to the lives of so many others in ways you’ll never know.
Dear sir Paul,
I wish you speedy recovery.
You were the one who inspired me to pickup woodworking with hand tools.
Please keep on going
All the best,
I have tried to be faithful to pray for you.
Paul, thank you for sharing your stories. Not only is it speaking truth and fury to the void, but your story is also a reassuring reminder to me of how one must inevitably encounter struggles of any magnitude. Too often we cycle through the years with a single-minded focus to reach a milestone, forgetting to be mindful of the chaos waiting just outside our field of view. The shock of the interruption can rattle our very core, but it can also be a piercing reminder from the cosmos to shake off the tunnel vision and acknowledge everything we value.
To design is to share, to create is borne out of love. I am grateful you are still able to share your creations!
Hello Paul. I’m sorry to hear that you were the victim of a barbarian attack. I hope you make a full recovery so you can continue to express your ingenuity through the art of woodworking. From Colombia, I send you a soft hug in consideration of your sensitive ribs.
I am seriously distressed by the violence that was inflicted upon you Paul. It is NOT your fault. There is no excuse for it. I’m sorry it happened, but very happy to see you back on your feet. You inspire us all! Please keep up the great work.
A sad story
At least if you had stayed in Texas, you could have shot the SOB.
Just to be clear, this happened in Texas? I was under the impression that you now live there. As a Texan, I lament the evaporation of the spirit of the state I grew up in. The influx of folks running away from states that they succeeded in screwing up has been tragic to watch. Frankly, I don’t recognize it any more. I recently borrowed a t-shirt from my brother that had the slogan, “Make American Like Texas” because I thought it was all in good fun. I’d have to ammend that now to be “Make American Like Texas Used To Be”.
No, not Texas. Yes, I lived there from 1986 until 2009, but turned in my green card and returned to the UK just outside Oxford. I’m working on my autobiography and I am currently on the Texas section so that is taking me back through the Hill Country and places like Fredericksburg, Llano, Bandera and on up to Waco, the passage I took from Uvalde on my journey that began in in the mid 1980s on up. What a fascinating journey and a distinctive end.
I wonder if these “buy anything for nothing” websites like temu – tema – tama.. whatever their name is, are going to market “clamp legs” any time soon…
Great to see you making again, Paul!